Camille & Jordan: Falling Apart

Title: Falling Apart
Rating: PG
Summary: Jordan fells like she’s walking on clouds, but dreams don’t last forever and hers is about to come crashing down.
Notes: Follows the Events of ‘The Softball Girl‘.
Warning(s): One girl is in love with another in this story. If offended, please don’t read.
Disclaimer:  This is a work of fiction. Not intended to represent any real persons, places, events, or things. This story is copyright Dawn Kelley and all rights to these characters belong to me.

She was acting weird. There was nothing else to call it. It was just weird. She spent far too much time in the bathroom getting ready in the morning. She was always with Katie, most of the time without anyone else around. These last seven months they had been inseperable. How had they become best friends?

Jase thought for sure once softball ended, once school broke for the summer, he would have his best friend back. That didn’t happen. The first day of summer break Jordan was preparing to spend the night at Katie’s for the first time.

Jason laid in the middle of Jordan’s bed, bouncing a ball against the ceiling as Jordan fretted over what to wear and what to pack. Jason had never known Jordan to pay that much attention to clothes. She use to complain that it took him far too long to decide on what to wear when they went shopping. He should have known soon or later the “girl gene” would kick in.

“How many other people are going to be there?” Jase asked, mostly to fill the silent space.

“Two, me and Katie,” Jordan replied, carefully folding a shirt.

“That isn’t much of a sleepover,” Jason replied.

“It’s plenty,” Jordan replied, hugging her P.J.s to herself.

There was this odd look in her eyes that gave Jase pause. He sat up.

“You two meetin’ some boys?” Jase questioned.

“No,” Jordan replied annoyed. “We can entertain each other quite well, thank you very much.”

Jordan slammed her suitcase shut and started down the stairs. Jase followed behind.

“Jase, I think this is the beginning of my best summer ever,” Jordan replied happily.

“Whatever,” Jason grumbled.

The two reached the bottom of the stairs where they heard their parents laughing together. They were in the living room when the two found them. Their parents seemed to be getting weirder and weirder about this whole “together” thing. They seemed to spend every night in each other’s company.

“I’m ready,” Jordan announced.

Jordan had been anticipating this sleep over tonight, but she felt a little weird being alone with Katie in her room. Everything had started out normal enough. They’d watched a few movies on cable while eating popcorn. Then they shared dinner with her mother. After that, the two of them were allowed to disappear upstairs.

That didn’t go to badly at first. They’d played a few video games on her computer, but that soon got boring. So they were then left with sitting on the bed side-by-side trying to decide what to do. They had kissed a few times, always briefly and in stolen moments. They sometimes went for long walks alone holding hands. Everything else was in sneaky moments like holding hands under the table in the library. Neither one of them had fully considered the pressure of being alone together in a bedroom.

Jordan stared nervously at her feet and suddenly felt very silly in her plain plaid Pajamas. Katie was in a soft white nightgown with a pink bear on the front. Her legs were smooth and silky, like black satin. Unlike Jordan’s which were full of scars and very rough.

On instinct, Jordan reached out and began to caress the leg calf exposed to her. Her hand came up Katie’s smooth leg, pushing back the nightgown and revealing a pair of cotton panties. Katie jumped off the bed.

“Jordan, I’m not ready,” Katie said suddenly.

“Ready for what?” Jordan asked, confused.

“That,” Katie told her. “I mean we can kiss, but I’m not ready to… I can’t be… you know… naked.”

“Okay,” Jordan said simply. “I was just touching you.” Jordan got up and moved closer to Katie. “I’d never do anything you didn’t want to do. If you ever want to stay stop, go ahead.”

Jordan pulled her close and kissed her. She’d gotten very use to kissing her. Katie seemed to relax in her embrace.

“Will you dance with me?” Jordan asked.

“Sure,” Katie said.

Jordan went over to Katie’s stereo and turned it on. She stuck in a Mary J. Blige CD and the soulful voice of the singer filtered into the room. Jordan walked back to Katie and took her hands cautiously in her own.

They began to dance with a good foot between their bodies. Katie said she felt kind of silly at this distance and pulled her closer.

“Am I your girlfriend?” Jordan asked. “I mean really or are we just playing around here.”

“Why are you asking?”

“Because I really like you,” Jordan admitted.

“I don’t know,” Katie told her. “Would we have to tell people?”

“Are you afraid to?”

“Aren’t you?” Katie questioned.

“Yeah, I don’t think they’d understand. I’d just like to know this is for real real though. That you care about me, the way I care about you.”


“Because I feel like my world isn’t right until I see your face. My whole body is on fire when you touch me. And when you smile, it’s like… I don’t know… some heavenly moment.”

“Oh Jordan,” Katie said blushing. “I’m not that special.”

“Yes you are,” Jordan told her.

She captured her lips in another kiss and they stopped dancing. Slowly they walked over to the bed and fell down on it. Katie pulled Jordan on top of her and the kissing grew more intense than it had ever been. Jordan’s fingers locked with Katie’s, pushing them down on the bed and for the first time Katie’s mouth opened to welcome her. Katie’s leg moved up, caressing against Jordan’s and then–

“Oh…my…god,” a young female voice said.

“Jordan, get off of me,” Katie yelled in response.

She pushed Jordan away as Jordan identified the voice. It was Sasha. Of all the people in the world, why did it have to be Sasha?

Katie had already jumped off the bed and was across the room. Tears had quickly formed in her eyes. Sasha was comforting her.

“I knew there was something wrong with her,” Sasha said.

Katie cast Jordan an apologetic glance.

“It was just a mistake Sasha,” Katie explained quickly.

“A mistake? She was forcing herself on you.”

“Forcing myself?” Jordan questioned, both offended and puzzled.

“Jordan, just go down to the living room or something,” Katie said.

“But Katie…”Jordan pleaded.

“Go!!” Katie exclaimed.

Jordan frowned, gathered her things and went down to the living room. Katie’s mother was there, watching some late night movie. She jumped up surprise.

“Can I go home?” Jordan questioned.

“But Sasha just got here,” Katie’s mother replied. “I thought you three girls–”

“No, we can’t get along, not the three of us.”

“I’m sorry, but Sasha has been Katie’s best friend since…”

“It’s okay, I don’t hate Katie or anything. I just want to go home.”

“Okay,” the woman said.

She got up off the couch and went to throw some clothes on. Jordan just slipped on some shoes. She wondered what Katie was telling Sasha. Katie’s mother came back from getting dressed and the two of them headed for the car. Jordan could only hope this would all be resolved tomorrow.

Jordan turned the key in the lock, hoping no one was awake. Hoping she at least had until morning to explain. Unfortunately, Jase was there. He was sitting on the couch with Big Jordan. Big J was sleeping as a horror movie played on the TV. Jason, however was wide awake and enjoying the film as he chowed down on a bowl of popcorn.

He looked up, surprised, at the sound of the door opening.


“Hey Jase,” Jordan said sadly and then started for the stairs.

“Wait,” Jason said, jumping off the couch. “What you doing here?”

“I don’t want to talk about it Jase,” Jordan told him. “I just want to sleep.”

Jordan began to walk away again.

“J,” Jase said. “I’m sorry if I’ve been acting a little jealous. You still my girl right?”

“Yeah, I’m still your girl.”

Jordan disappeared up the stairs as quickly as possible then. She fell on the bed, closed her eyes, and tried to forget everything bad from just a few hours before. Instead she focused on the good, like holding Katie in her arms and feeling her warmth against her. She remembered the feeling of their lips touching. She remembered the feeling their bodies together on the bed. What more would have happened without Sasha’s interruption?

“Jordan, Jordan!!” Jason yelled, shaking her awake.

“What what,” the grumpy girl said in response.

“Mark just called me,” Jason said, flopping down on the bed.

“So,” Jordan said sitting up.

“Please tell me you didn’t,” Jason said.

“Didn’t what?” Jordan questioned, sitting up.

“Rape Katie,” he whispered.

“What!!” Jordan yelled, jumping out of bed. “Did she say that? Please tell me she didn’t.”

“I don’t know, but everybody is talking about it.”

“Oh no,” Jordan said to herself.

“Is she lying?” Jase questioned.

“We were kissing, okay. She was kissing me because she wanted to. We’ve been kissing for months now.”

“Eww, why?”

“Because I love her Jason!”

Jason sat still a moment processing the information. Then he looked up at her.

“You’re really… gay?”

Jordan nodded. “I just have never felt any kind of special way about a guy. So yeah, I’m gay I guess.”

“And Katie, she is too.”

“I don’t know. She liked me enough, but maybe not. I mean she liked you too.”

“Really,” the boy replied, excited.

“Yeah, but she sort of got over you while she was with me. I guess I just got it like that.”

Jordan shot him a teasing grin. He returned her smile.

“So what really happened?” he asked.

Jordan sighed and reluctantly divulged the whole story. She told him about dancing with Katie, about Sasha’s interruption, Katie’s reaction, and Jordan deciding to come home. As she told the story, it suddenly occurred to Jordan that Sasha might tell Katie’s mother this “rape” story. Jordan hoped Sasha’s story hadn’t gotten to adult ears.

“Well, I believe you,” Jason told her upon completion of her tale. “I don’t think you’d ever force yourself on anyone.”

Jordan was thankful for Jase at least, but what about everyone else. She glanced over at the clock. It was almost noon. She fell on the bed and buried her head in the pillow. She didn’t want to deal with facing anyone today and since she didn’t have to, she wouldn’t.

Jason, somehow, dragged Jordan out of bed and convinced her to go to the mall. Jordan didn’t really want to go, but figured anything was better than being alone right now. So an hour after being dragged out of bed, Jordan found herself on the bus with Jason.

Jason was chatting excitedly about some new video game he wanted to buy, but Jordan didn’t join in. She was quite sure a week ago she too was into this game, she recalled her own excitement upon seeing it in a magazine. Today, however, nothing meant anything.

The bus came to a halt and new passengers got on. She heard the giggly girls before she saw them. She immediately began to sink down in the seat, making her best effort to hide behind Jason.

“Oh now you tryin’ to push up on a man,” Sasha said, her voice cutting like a knife. The sneering girls surrounding Sasha and Katie obviously had heard the same story Jason had that morning.

“Sasha,” Katie interrupted. “Just leave it alone.”

“I’m taking up for you,” Sasha snapped.

“I don’t need to be taken up for,” Katie told her. “You just misunderstood.”

“No, you misunderstood. This girl is nasty. She was a dyke from the day you met her.”

“And yet she still chose to be her friend,” Jason said, standing up. “What does that tell you?”

“KATIE IS NOT A DYKE!!” Sasha yelled, causing several people on the bus to turn in their direction.

“Did she tell her mom? Huh? If she was so violated…” Jason went on, but Jordan stared at Katie. Katie sunk into the bus seat and was now curling up as close as she could to the window. Jordan wasn’t mad at her at all. She’d never really expected Katie to come out to her friends. What they’d had, if only briefly, had been enough.

“Jase,” Jordan begged. “Leave it alone. Let her think what she wants.”

“But Jordan–,” Jason began to argue.

“Jason, everyone that needs to know the truth, knows it.”

She hit the bus bell, indicating she wanted to get off on the next stop. She and Jason exited the bus at that stop to avoid any continued awkwardness.

“Why?” Jason asked. “Why didn’t you tell her the truth?”

“She wouldn’t believe me. Like she said, Katie isn’t a dyke.”

“Except she–”

“Kissed me a few times, so what?” Jordan shrugged. “Maybe like me she just needed to ask the question. Maybe once she did, in the end she got a different answer.”

“You better than me Jordan,” Jason told her. “If some girl accused me of raping her, I wouldn’t let her off the hook.”

“I’d rather not make her miserable. Its gonna be hard enough keeping my own head once this all gets out.” Jordan sighed. “You think Harrison and Mark will hate me?”

“No,” Jason told her. “If they do, they were never our real friends.” They stood in silence for a moment. “Jordan, even though you’re gay, are you still my girl?”

“I’ll always be your girl,” Jordan told him.

Jason smiled and hugged her.

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Welcome to Dawn is a writer, theatre artist, and film maker. She loves to create and be a part of the creative. This is my webspace playground, for blogging, displaying my work, and general all-around fan fun.
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